I am a firm believer that where you grow up plays a significant role in terms of your personality, expectations in life, dialect, accent, and even what you want from a man or women. Some might argue … but trust me … its undeniable

Going to a big state school brought in people from all over. Also being minutes away from Howard University and living in the Washington DC area, a mixing pot from all across the nation (and world really), I have dated, talked with, yelled obscenities across the street at (hey you … in the pink … with the ass), and courted women from all over the country. I am far from “full coverage” of the spectrum, but here are my findings so far.

So … here is SBM’s handy guide to dating from different regions.

*disclaimer*: This applies only to Black Women.

Washington, DC & Prince George’s County, MD

Figured I would start with home. People now call the area the DMV (for DC, Maryland, & Virginia), but things can change up big time when you cross the state or county line.

I personally have enacted a ban on all women who were raised in either of these areas. I can’t stand them at all! I have only dated one for a significant amount of time, but have grown up around them, and they have some of the worst attitudes I have ever encountered. They expect a lot, usually have a streak of hood rat in them, no matter how good the pedigree, and love to get mad over the stupidest sh*t ever. The B* word comes to mind as I write this. Also, if your not from here expect to spend a lot of time in my glossary trying to understand her.

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Quick tempers, “unique” style in clothes, high demands, disproportionate love for thugs, and an undeserved sense of “I’m the sh*t” even when she isn’t, characterizes this one. Proceed with caution.

I will say … we have gorgeous women though. PG is nicknamed “Pretty Girl” county and damn it if we don’t live up to it. I mean even going to church turns into a mental test of concentration.

Baltimore

I don’t know what it is, but two things Baltimore is filled with … Big Girls and Rollers (women of a promiscuous nature). One of the few place I know that still has a red light district with hookers and strip clubs. Be careful of an STD though, they flirt with the #1 spot for AIDS every other year.

The stories my friends have of some Bmore girls are just nuts though, especially those who went to school up there. One guy got approached by a girl who said “I wanna f*ck you tonight” and then walked off. He didn’t think anything of it, until she found him at the let out and took him home. Damn.

New York City

Sometimes it shocks me how quickly this city can ruin good women. I don’t know if I’ve ever met a New Yorker I liked. Because of the general “don’t trust anyone” attitude of all new Yorkers, they can be crass, rude and obviously distrusting. Nowhere is like NY, according to them, and everywhere south of Philly is
the “South” (so stupid). Everywhere is slow compared to NY, and expect to work for anything with this women. Also, don’t expect favors, kind words, or not to work overly hard … for anything. I hear if your a fellow New Yorker … its all much easier.

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New Jersery

They provide balance to the NY area. They are a lot nicer, strong lovers, and usually well balanced and good catches. Accents can get annoying (I swear if I hear “caw-feee” instead of “coffee” one more time in my life), but a small price to pay for a well rounded individual.

Atlanta

A varied bunch with the recent growth of the city and the extreme increase in them number of implants (people moving there from some other city … not titties). Generally, really big into getting married and settling down, but overall seem a little crazy. Country but progressive. Expect to truly deal with the “hybrid” (old school chivalry mixed with new aged independence).

Texas (based on Austin, TX)

They say Austin is a lot different then the rest of Texas, but I have visited Houston & Dallas too. Generally, Texas women are so nice … I mean makes me feel special nice. I mean, there just aren’t bad attitudes. I’m talking about a girl actually apologizing to me because her feet hurt and she doesn’t want to dance!

They seemed to be slightly under par in the looks department (sorry) … but made up for it with their personalities. Texas based women still hold a special place in my heart (plus how many other women can do “My dougie” and know about Chamillionaire back in the “Color Changing Clique” days and Slim Thug when he was a “Boss Hogg Outlaw”.

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Florida

A lot of variance, so haven’t made any across the board observations except one … never have I met a set of women so comfortable with sharing exactly what is on their mind … no matter if its hurtful or mean … as long as its the truth. Its kind of refreshing … unless she f’s around and hurts your feeling by saying something.

Actually, these women also love hard! So far, they intrigue me. I’m gonna add a few more to the roster and see what happens.

Seattle, Washington

THERE ARE NO BLACK WOMEN IN SEATTLE!

I was there 3 months. Saw like 5 or 6 and they seem to not want to acknowledge the fact they gotta compete with millions of white women with a sweet tooth for chocolate. I did not enjoy Seattle!

Midwest

No across the board observations … but I’ve never had anything with any of them work out at all. I’ve had guy friends from Chi-town, and them n*ggas are wild. I mean every single one acts straight like Bernie Mac. Loud, arrogant, cocky, and quick to blow up. Never dated anyone from the chi, but I can only imagine what living in a city of Bernie Macs does to a woman.

So what cities did I miss? Any females available to co-sign with my regional descriptions (or argues as I know someone will)? The west has generally been unknown to me, so anyone can fill it in for me?