penis-grad

**** Admin Note ****
New poll up! Dating without sex …got it in ya?
– SBM
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I’ve grown into an elitist and … unfortunately …  it’s not that hard to admit.

The makings of it are all there if you think about it – I was educated at an East Coast Blue-Blood HJCU (Historically Jewish College or University) and I’m an Alpha. I certainly wasn’t raised an elitist though. The only thing blue in my blood growing up was the Houdini Kool-Aid when Gerland’s or Apple Tree had it on special. But gone are the days of after-school, weekend and summer programs telling us how we “can make it” as we play props for photo ops. I made it right? I’m out the hood and got high ass rent to prove it!

So, as an elitist I have come to the conclusion that a college degree of some sort is needed as a prerequisite to get my time and my dick.

Before moving to LA this was never a question, thought, concern or issue. In the South and on the East Coast, it seems as if any given person who can spell their name will be at somebody’s degree granting institution. So then, the criteria would not be just a degree but rather, a degree from the “right” school, you know one with accreditation. But then I got to LA. Where every attractive female I seem to meet lacks that “young professional” edge.

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When lamenting my beef with the current state of things in LA, my patnah told me “LA is for flings, not for anything real. Find the hook-up on Lacoste and some concert tickets and settle.” And for the hopeless yet apathetic romantic in me, that’s depressing.

The other day I was at dinner with a young lady and asking her how her acting class was going – because of course that’s what she does because we live in Los Angeles.

Her: “It’s going good. Today was a real tough day, I got a scene assigned so I have a lot of work to do.”
Mr. FAQs: “O ok, that’s wassup. What is the scene from?”
Her: “You ever heard of ‘A Raisin in the Sun’ before? Puff Daddy played in the movie.”
Mr. FAQs: “O yea, I’ve heard of that before.”

And at that point my little love seeking heart flat lined. In this case one of two things is true. 1, she legitimately had NO CLUE that this play was written well before Sean Combs was thought about (1959 according to Wikipedia) and/or 2, she is accustomed to talking to dudes that accept Puff Daddy as a validating character.  Either way its unacceptable for me or my dick.

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I feel that to often the issue of Black men being forced to settle is trumped by Black women having to settle because you know, every eligible bachelor is either dead or in jail.

Its not that I think a degree is necessary because I want to lie in bed and have intellectually stimulating conversations – that would be occasionally nice but I mean it’s not needed every day.  Its more or less a matter of standards.  How hard would you clown your friend for falling for the newspaper delivery person?

At the end of the day, it comes down to who you see yourself building with – personally and spiritually. If I have and wish to continue to achieve certain things in life, I need someone by my side who can stack with me and that is not overly concerned with how pretty the bricks are … one reason degree’d want degree’d. And correct me if I’m wrong but dating is how you find that person correct?

Now … I will not call this young lady dumb and I will admit that it will take a lot of effort on my part to allow her and her counterparts to fall by the wayside. And I’m fully aware that I can only blame myself in this at the end of the day. Perhaps if I altered things I do and places I meet people it would be different, but that’s the obvious and that’s besides the point!

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So while everybody is pontificating these glowing resolutions, I’m keeping mine nice and simple: All I want in ’09 is a clean pussy with a degree!