The Senator: I didn’t want to say her name because she had heard so many females’ names over the weekend I didn’t want her to get concerned.

Dr. J: You should have told her it was just a friend.
The Senator: You know that is not going to work.
Dr. J: What did I say? Break every rule. You say, that’s my friend, and if she asks, what friend? Just say, “Oh this is just some b*tch I used to f*ck.” And if she gets upset, let her know, “Well then, don’t ask me no questions!” Infrastructure! It’s all about infrastructure. How you build your relationship will determine everything and real men can’t have women asking them questions.
And I mean this with the utmost respect to the women; Fellas, you have got to learn how to tell these women to shut up and sit they ass down somewhere. If you don’t, you’ll let them run around you and get away with anything. Manage the “Expect Sh*t” factor, homie.
Here’s how you should handle some situations that WILL happen in your relationship:
Under no circumstances do you let these women tell you about something that’s going on with one of their friends’ relationships. (And always ignore comments from her jealous, no man having friends.) Nip this in the bud, quickly. Do not even let your women feel comfortable to come to you and say something like, “Chrissy said that her man and her spend at least one whole day a weekend together. Why you always running to the club with your boys and watching football on Sunday?” If he’s got his ish together, he’ll say, “Wait… since when did I start dating Chrissy?” And you know what she’ll do, she’ll sit her ass down somewhere and have a coke.
You have to let her know you’re a man, not a boy or her son. Do not let women just come out they face any old type of way to you. Set her straight, let her know the pace, and her role. Perfect example of how women will overstep the boundaries; when you are having discourse over the phone and she’s in the car with her friends and now she want to act all big and in-charge, as though she is the boss. Hang up the phone and when her friends drop her off at y’all place, make sure all of her belongings are placed neatly in a box by the front door. Do not answer your phone or door. I bet, she’ll think twice before stepping out of line again.
Be yourself in the bedroom. There are several women who will tell you that they will not stay with a man who is wack in bed. If there weren’t women consistently sleeping with these guys, they wouldn’t be found out. They say, he’s wack in bed, but they have feelings for the guy. Fellas, exploit that weakness. After all, you need to be in tune with your own body. Make sure she understands that you both had the same amount of time to reach the same goal. If she can’t keep up, that’s a personal problem.
My boy got caught cheating on his girl, so his girl, decided to take him back, but she asked for all his passwords; email, AIM, facebook, and voicemail. Now he has no privacy as a contingency of her taking him back. And I thought, shoot tell her that she’s already decided to take you back, you apologize and it won’t happen again, but all that other nonsense, she can go ‘head. Real talk, more times than most people think, when someone cheats they usually work it out. People talk trash like if someone cheats they out right away. Wrong again! Most people work it out.
Excerpt from Baby Boy, truncated:
Yvette: You get with any of them girls you sell dresses to?
Jody: A few. Feel better now? I love you, girl. You got my son and you’ll probably be my wife. You’re my woman. Them other hos is tricks. I make love to you, I want to be with you, but I f*ck other females occasionally. I don’t know why, I just do. That’s the situation. You feel better now? That’s some honesty for you. Deal with it. I love you enough to be honest.
Yvette: If you loved me, you wouldn’t lie to me all the time.
Jody: Move! Hold on. You got it all twisted up! I lie ’cause I do love you. Being honest would mean I don’t give a f*ck.
Sometimes, you have to be a bit of a jerk. But you have to do that, show them who’s boss. Even if you are 100% and unequivocally WRONG. Like take for example, Chrissy and her man do spend one day a weekend together. It would be quite ridiculous if you couldn’t manage to do that. But if you get called on it, do not worry that you are just absolutely wrong, just tell her to sit down and shut up. After all, she’s not going anywhere.
Always 100,
Dr. J