Scenario 1

Boo’d Up Dude: Yeah man, me and shorty headed to the Caribbean. Lookin’ forward to it.
Concerned Friend: Dude, you know this could be it right?
BUD: What you mean? I’m not bringing a ring with me or anything.
CF: Man, vacations can either be the end or beginning of the heart of the relationship.
BUD: Come to think of it, you may be right. A lot of couples beef before and after trips.
CF: I wish yall the best man. I hope things go okay down there.
BUD: Things are always okay when I go down there…
CF: You perverted Bastard.
BUD: Yep.

Scenario 2

CF2: So you and shorty talkin’ about potentially living together?
BUD: Yeah, we still in a recession man. Gotta save the loot. We get along well though.
CF2: You do know that once you move in together, there’s no turning back right?
BUD: We’ll be aight. We spend a lot of time spooned up as is.
CF2: That’s cool and all, but if yall decide to go back to separate apartments after a year, the relationship is done B.
BUD: Can’t people just be happy for me!?!?!?

There are a lot of things at play that can make or break a relationship. Aside from people slidin’ off or just treatin’ their significant other like sh*t, there are more subtle yet equally as monumental events that can either strengthen the bond or make it dissolve like alka-seltzer. The 2 scenarios I presented above are things that should be “happy events”. Key words for this are “should be”. I used to just think that these things were myths. How could going on a vacation with your boo be a potentially bad thing? How could making an informed decision to move in together backfire? I used to be a young and naive fellow. Then I started consulting and playing therapists for family members and friends. It was at that point that I realized the perils of each situation.

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Vacations: Too Much Quality Time?

Many of us have been on vacations with our boos. I’m talkin about happy vacations where we go and take cute pics to put up on Facebook, Myspace, or Twitter. The type of pics that will have shorty and her girls saying “awwww” and his boys sayin’ “you are one poptart arse negro!” Yes, you know exactly what I’m talking. Vacations are supposed to be a time to relax and enjoy each other’s company. But honestly, when you’re on an island or resort with that same person for hours upon hours without a real excuse to get away, this dramatically increases the opportunity for OD deep talk and arguments. Sometimes we don’t see the true someone until they are completely relaxed. A vacation is one of the ideal times for someone to relax and let the real them shine through.

Movin’ On In

This one may be a bit more obvious, but moving in with the boo seems great on the surface even though it can prevent major obstacles down the road. Once yall move in together, you really can’t go back to gettin’ your own places if things don’t work out. If yall can’t resolve your issues and continue to renew the lease, the relationship def won’t be renewed. I never been through this one, but it seems to be one of those unsaid things.

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So for today, what do yall think? Are vacations and shacking up really make or break situations or can a couple recover? Are there any other major or events or situations that can seal the deal? And lastly, what are your stories? Have any of the readers here shacked up and broke up or went on vacation and ended up crappier than when you started? Let’s discuss.

Tentatively taking romatic trips,

slim jackson