SBM: “Hey love.”
The Boo:
“Hey yourself!”
“Did I do something? Is something wrong?”
“Yeah. Did you realize that we hadn’t talked for 18 hours! Weren’t you supposed to call me last night?”
“We did talk. I was heading into my group study session. We did have the presentation today.”
“Why didn’t you call me after?”
“I didn’t get home until 4am and had to wake-up at 7am. Sorry.”
“I just feel like you don’t pay me enough attention and …” *insert Snoopy ‘womp womp womp’ voice*
“Are you on your period? You seem really moody?”
*eyes roll in socket and turn blood red … storm brews overhead* “WTF! You b*tch a** n***a! I’m tired of men thinking that if we as women get angry that it has to be the result of hormones!”
“Can you answer the question though?”
*lunges at my throat*

Fact: Women have periods (except those afflicted with menopause or good birth control) roughly once a month.

Fact: Premenstrual Syndrome (Called PMS) is a medically defined reality.

Fact: “[The] three most prominent symptoms are irritability, tension, and dysphoria (unhappiness)”.

Now, those of you who know me personally and those of you who have been following me for some time know that I am truly a man of logic.  My life is guided by logical decisions that are based on facts and making the best decision given the situation.  Some call it cold and methodological, but to those I say “F*** you wit your overemotional soft a**”.

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Therefore, when my SO, FwB, or good ol’ jumpoff is acting out of the norm and seems to be hyper emotional and sensitive … my mind looks for answers and explanations.

Did I do something that I don’t normally do? … Not really.  Next!

Did I forget a birthday or anniversary? …. Nope. Next!

Did Barack f* around and leave Michelle and illicit an unanimous out-lash amongst black women? … Nope … White House is solid. Next!

Is it possible … just possible that the monthly fluctuation of hormones is afflicting her personal judgement at the moment and causing her to act in a matter that is out of character? … Sounds like a winner

Basically, I don’t see what the problem is.  We both know that once a month your hormones will come out and turn every man into “the enemy” and every previously irrational thought into “the truth”.  Why can’t we both admit to it?  Why can’t we both realize the effect of chemicals playing “who do we curse out today” on your body?

Why is this so taboo and insulting?  I have spent a lot of time thinking about it.  I have thought about some similar thing that you could ask me and I would get “eye dagger” angry about.  And I couldn’t come up with a single thing … nothing.  To make things worst, as a good boyfriend I may be asked to purchase Midol, maxi-pads, or tampons.  When it comes to getting supplies to placate and handle “Aunt Flow” … then I can talk about it and she is real.  But as soon as I deduce the reason for me getting yelled at has to do with hormones … suddenly I’m a b*tch a** n****a.

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This is my public outcry to all women.  This is yet another Public Service Announcement brought to you by the SBM staff.  Please please please can we stop pretending PMS is a myth.  Can we please take PMS out of this “can’t talk about it” status.  Lets get rid of the gag order?

Ladies, explain and educate me and the male masses.  Men, share some tips that apparently I haven’t learned yet.

– SBM aka “Yes baby … its my fault” aka “You sure you’re not on your period, because I think you are!”