You know what I'm talking about?

I was sitting one night on my balcony enjoying the lake and sipping on a night cap.  The exact thought process leading me  to my next though is irrelevant … but I soon found myself reliving a memorable scene from college …

SBM: “You don’t do what?”
Anomaly: “I don’t give head”
SBM: “You don’t do it anymore you mean? What happened?”
Anomaly: “I’ve never done it.  It’s disgusting.  It’s slimy down there and there are all kinds of juices … yuck”
SBM: “WTF man.  Hey … Fiend (another roommate) come out here”
Fiend: “What’s up?”
SBM: “You eat p*ssy, right?”
Fiend: “Like a champ” (Fiend is a stone cold freak BTW)
SBM: “Me too.  How is it Anomaly never has and says he never will”
Fiend (Looks at Anomaly): “N***a … what! You are 23 and it’s the 21st century … What do you mean you don’t eat pussy???”
Anomaly: “Its nasty”
Fiend: “Man up n***a!”
SBM (Shaking head): “Anomaly … your a grown ass man dawg.  I bet you expect to get head though.”
Anomaly: “Yeah!”
SBM: “My brother … that’s just selfish.  How can you ask for what you won’t give?”
Anomaly: “Been working for me so far”
Fiend: “This is a sad day … I’m going back to my room”
SBM: “Damn Shame!  They still make people like you?”

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Yeah … do they still make people like this?

Now, I understand that not every male is going to be utterly obsessed with performing this act like me, but how can anyone male or female just refuse to do it?  I mean … there was a whole sexual revolution in the 70’s (so I heard).  The stuff people consider normal nowadays would make even the most liberal 60’s parent cringe in horror … and your telling me you won’t lick a clit or hum on some balls?

Well … this is Social Darwinism at its finest.  These sick individuals will eventually be eliminated from the gene pool as no one will produce offspring with them.  Who would want to raise their children in a world without head?  I can bring no child into a world like that!  But at the core of the issue … a person’s refusal to give head boils down to one thing …

Its f*cking selfish!

If you can’t endure 10-30 minutes of something you don’t enjoy for the happiness of someone else … why should I do anything for you?

Have I pleasured some women who didn’t deserve it … yes.  Have I given more than I received … probably so.  But I know at the end of the day that I brought joy to someone else (well … I like doing it too … but that’s irrelevant) … and someone screamed, shook all over, yelled “Jesus” smiled as a result of my actions.

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So … I say to you .. the SBM family … my brothers … my sisters … go home tonight and show that special someone how much you appreciate them.  Lick that love button until she quakes throughout her body.  Deep throat until he gets light-headed and needs to sit down.  You are personally making this world a better place and I thank you on behalf of all humanity!

Feel me?