Website: Twitter: @WisdomIsMisery

Excuse me, do you have any black in you? Would you like some???

R.I.P. Pimp C 1973 -2007
Let Me See It:

“I’m a country ass n***a;
I f**ked wit’ yo’ wife…
If yo’ b***h come around,
We put some d*ck in her life.”

And that’s why I don’t trust country brothas. I could end this post there but lets delve further. I don’t know if it’s because I’m getting older or what but I’ve noticed a significant amount of married, yes married – not just in a relationship – women approaching me lately. I’m nothing special so I imagine this experience isn’t unique to myself.

What I’m wondering is, what are my responsibilities in this situation? I mean, I’m not the one that took the vows but am I still obligated to respect them? I know a handful of women who openly cheat on their husbands. How their husbands don’t know is beyond me, because everyone else seems to know. Or maybe they do know. Who knows, there are too many unknown knowns.

Does it matter if the woman is only in a relationship vs. married? Does that make it any better or worse? Should I walk away from any woman that admits she’s in a relationship, married or otherwise?

Honestly, I think a woman’s situation – single or not – has little to do with me. I don’t actively approach women I know are in a relationship and in most cases, I’ll walk away if I find out such information later. However, in the cases I’m referencing the women approached me. This tells me that she has already discounted the merits of her own relationship. This leads me to conclude that if not me, it would be some other man. For instance, if Alicia Keys comes at me bro, please believe I won’t lose sleep over how Swizz Beatz feels about it.

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There is an exception and that’s if you’re my good friend. And I mean real friend, not some dude I know exists. In that situation, if your girl tries to get at me, I’ll not only turn her down, I’ll more than likely let you know. I say ‘more than likely’ because sometimes a woman isn’t a habitual cheater. I, as your best-friend, am the most convenient and hurtful target. I’m not saying it’s a fact, but I’ve definitely witnessed on repeat occasions that if a woman is trying to hurt you, she’s going to REALLY hurt you. e.g. with your best-friend or your worst enemy.

On the other hand, I find women have in abundance something men often lack – will power. Sure, a woman might want to get it in with the entire football team but she has the will power to resist such temptation. Whereas, if a man wants to get it in with the cheerleading squad, those cheerleaders better keep their head on a swivel. I don’t know how but women walk away from xes all the time. Sometimes they blatantly turn it down or put it off for years and years. I’m not saying they don’t exist but I run into few men who choose to go without xes. Excluding religious reasons, I don’t know any.

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Therefore, I will admit, as a single man, I do believe it’s up to the woman to determine if relations will or will not be had; especially, if she’s married. I believe this because men are simple and opportunistic. Some men might disagree with me because they’ve been faithful to their woman and vise versa and they might also disagree they’re simple – but just because you can read a book and quote a few Malcolm X verses doesn’t impress me. On a granular level, I still believe when you see a phat [donkey] pass by you’re going to think the same thing as the rest of my simpletons and it won’t have anything to do with opining on how high her SAT scores were. You have made the choice not to act on your impulses – and I commend you.

Fellow single people, are you as responsible as the committed person to respect the boundaries of their relationship even if they do not? Is it different if they’re in a relationship vs. married? Would you ever knowingly be with a married man/woman? If a married person approaches you are you obligated to tell their spouse? What will you do or did you do to ensure that your relationship or marriage is strong and established enough not to be infiltrated by the likes of a ‘Pimp C’?