**Was digging around on my old site and found this one. Enjoy.**

Dating ain't teach me how to dance doe.

The other night I was getting my dose of Twitternet and noticed that #collegetaughtme was the hot new trending topic. Everybody was following the hashtag with things they learned from college ranging from promissory notes to trains…and I don’t mean a mode of transportation unless the destination is New Triz City near Nutville and Groupsberg. Yesterday morning I logged on to Facebook and noticed some freshly posted pictures from one of my friends that happens to be tied to a few people in my past. Similar to the child that knows a noisy radiator means hot but decides to touch it anyway, I clicked to view the album and quickly found myself turning into Mumbles McExpletives.

There are still a couple women from relationships past that if someone told me they were seriously injured I’d say “Karma is the b*tch that never forgets.” And for as much as I dislike these people, I have to be thankful for the ideas they spark. As I was brushing my teeth and thinking about falling pianos, the light-bulb went off and I had a moment of genius that led me to this post. How about #datingtaughtme? So for today, here are a few lessons learned from my adventures in booships.

See Also:  Family History

#datingtaughtme that taking the high road doesn’t mean I have to be cordial later on.

Some people need to be phased out of life like characters out of books. They may have committed an egregious act and you no longer want anything to do with them. I’ve learned that it’s better to not speak than to come off hostile. As you probably noticed, I have a way with words. This translates into spoken wit. That’s not good for somebody. If the gasoline and match met on the bridge, I’m not obligated to say anything to you no matter what people around me may think.

#datingtaughtme that upfront friendship doesn’t necessarily make for a better romantic relationship.

Sometimes 1 + 1= 2.5

It should make sense, but most of the time it just doesn’t work. Extra points for being able to joke, drink, and smoke together doesn’t mean y’all should be together. You may, however, be able to sleep together repeatedly and not feel dirty in the morning.

#datingtaughtme that “stop being so insecure” can really mean “You almost caught me cheating and I need to make you divert your attention and chase your tail.”

Trust your instincts. Need I say more?

#datingtaughtme that you get out what you put in. Pause.

See Also:  I Haven't Been Fully Honest with You

If a relationship is failing, you should be looking at yourself first. Instead of venting to your peoples about how upset the sugar-gone-sourcakes is making you, try figuring out what you could be doing better. This also applies to general affection. No Country for Sit and Wait. A closed mouth don’t get fed. You get my drift.

#datingtaughtme
the importance of kissing.

There is passion before insertion. I can assert my manliness before inserting my manliness (throwback), etc. As a matter a fact, I wrote a whole post on kissing. Wack kissing leads to short relationships. Doctors Phil and Drew as well as Dr. Steve Harvey confirmed this…

So those are just a few things that #datingtaughtme. What has it taught you? For the purpose of this post, dating doesn’t just mean going out and awkwardly sitting at dinner faking it ’til you make…out.

I helped her get it re-upholstered,