flirting

In part one of my interactive series, I explored characteristics of successful men that appeal to women. I gave qualities other than the usual that men (and women) could use to better themselves, become versatile, and develop more appeal. This week, after another conversation with the homies,  we tried to figure out why men needed to stress superficial nonsense when meeting women. I went into a rant that turned into this blog, and if you know me offline, you know I’m a storyteller by nature. If men knew the complexity they perceive courting as was actually simple, we would have more brothers with unblemished hairlines today. To me, there are 5 facts of life about male-female interactions that a man should know to succeed:

Attractive Men Start With One Foot In The Door

We’ve spoken about “attraction triggers” on this site since it’s inception. Men’s attraction to women is primarily visual, while women can be attracted to personality, stature, and other non-superficial qualities. This explains the phenomenon of an attractive woman dating a man that most would consider aesthetically unappealing. So when you’re a man who’s handsome, in good shape, and is deemed attractive by general standards, you are golden. G.I. Joe once taught me that knowing is half the battle. If a woman thinks you look good, that man has already reached a 50% success level. Depending on the perception your look projects, women may assume that you’re arrogant or conceited, but being attractive will get you an audience with women to further state your case and seal the deal.

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Women Know Where Men Stand With Them When They First Meet

If you’ve read relationship articles, spoken to your friends, watched sitcoms, or have walked the Earth for at least 10 years, you’ve heard the cliché that “within the first 5 minutes women know where you fall in the lover/friend spectrum.” While I agree that this sentiment holds some credence to a woman’s level of attraction to men, it cannot be contained to specific time intervals. I believe that it’s within the first interaction that women make that mental note that determines if a man has the opportunity to chase her waterfalls. This could be a 30-second introduction between mutual friends, a group conversation in a social setting, an intimate first conversation, or watching you from afar.

As stated in my point above, being attractive will only strengthen a woman’s intrigue. Once they interact with you, if you don’t mess it up (i.e. say something stupid), then you can be one of her potential suitors. Women go into advanced analysis when they first meet you. They rank you on looks and potential. Potential will be weighted more than looks. Think of your appearance as the votes along party lines (the given) and your personality and level of potential as swing votes in a U.S. Presidential election. You know you can count on your party votes (your looks), but to win the necessary electoral votes, you need to win those key battle ground states (personality and your potential). Aesthetic appeal is a constant and potential is a variable. Depending on what women see and desire both physically and mentally, they know what they want from you, and whether or not you have a chance to get that and more.