black-men-versus-black-women

Sometimes we settle for things or people that we know don’t make us happy. We go through the motions and hope things change or we become comfortable in our “situation”. We know we’re unhappy but we fail to leave. Fortunately, the guys over at ThoughtCatalog tell us why we shouldn’t settle and how to move on:

Why do we do it? We meet someone, we are semi-interested, we exchange info. We go out a couple times. We’re still very “meh” about the whole thing. Yeah, he’s alright, we think. And he does everything right. He calls and texts (but not too much), he does sweet things to let you know he’s into you, he makes and keeps future dates, he opens up. So you let down your guard, you open up, too. And you admit to yourself that you like him. Maybe this time is different?

And then it happens. His calls and texts get shorter and more sporadic. You feel like you’re the one always initiating. And thus begins The Doubt Game. You question everything. Is he not texting as much because he’s more comfortable with me and doesn’t feel the need to, or has he lost interest? Should I call him, or should I wait for him to call me? I’ll wait. That will show me that he’s into me. But it’s been a two days. Maybe he’s doing the same thing, waiting for me to call him. Should I call? Oh god. I’ve gone insane.

You date. It’s been a few months. But it’s not the same. He’s more comfortable with you, yes, but that’s not necessarily a good thing. He’s cancelled or postponed plans a few times because of A, B, C reason. They are all legitimate and understandable reasons. Work. A friend needs him to do something.

He’s just not feeling good. You understand. You accommodate. Because you are understanding and accommodating. You really don’t mind. Isn’t that what a good girlfriend does? Be supportive? Laid back?

No pressure here! Whatever, it’s cool!

But how much is too much? That’s the question.

Read the rest here: