Hey guys and gals! It’s chat time!
Not to toot my own horn but I’m pretty much a professional when it comes to the whole concept of hollering at a guy. It took some time to get here but practice makes perfect! Peep our hollering 101 episode here for more pointers.
What I don’t understand, however, is the fact that so many guys have not mastered this art and yet they’ve been in the game longer than me! What’s up with that!? I know that most of the females reading this will understand. There are some hollering tactics that most men should knowingly avoid and so today I’d like to lend a hand to my friends, of the testosterone race. In turn, this will help you out too, gals! If you agree with my pointers below, make sure that you let me know in the comment section below. Who knows! You may also pick up some notes too, or at least get a good laugh during the read
Here’s to the basics! When should he avoid hollering at you? Take some solid notes on the below, playas!
1.When She’s At The Gym…
“Don’t approach me mid-workout. I’m already in my zone and approaching then would probably only decrease your chances. Hmm…Unless you can show me some new moves.” – Veijor, 22
2.When She’s On The Phone…
“If I’m walking down the street and on the phone, DON’T’ INTERUPT ME. I’m on a call! Smile at me or wave. If I don’t respond or do a quick wave and continue my call then, guess what? I’m not interested. Remember this one thing: If I was interested, I’d excuse myself from my phone conversation and continue ours.” – Sacha, 28
3.If There Are Headphones In Her Ear…
“If headphones are in my ear and I haven’t removed them then chances are that I’m not interested. Sorry” – Lisa, 25
Check out the rest of the list over at WWMD and let us know if you have any other tips or experiences with this!
You mean there are appropriate times to street harass? I keed I keed. The list is common sense, although I may have tried to get at a receptionist a few times, but the overall theme is they’re busy, you’re a stranger, that’s already a disadvantage. It’s kinda funny how women don’t care to be bothered when they’re out and about but if I were to follow them on twitter/instagram since its clear as day to see on them jumbotron galaxy screens and hollered from there she’d probably go for it.
You know what is truly funny about all 5 points? In each one its basically saying "Its okay to test the water and if I respond with interest…continue. If not….desist." Kind of like what a number of us said before with this whole "street harassment" thing. Well look at that LOL
larnelw: "In each one its basically saying 'Its okay to test the water and if I respond with interest…continue. If not….desist.'"
The Tom Brady Corollary holds true.
Doesn’t it seem like the list of
places and situations where you can’t or shouldn’t approach a woman grows longer and longer?
If she looks like she’s headed somewhere (btw, where are these women wandering around aimlessly and why would I want to approach such a woman);
if she’s exercising;
if she’s at work;
if she’s at church;
if she’s with a group of girlfriends (because they might be on a “just hanging with the girls” night out);
even for the dudes who go to clubs I’ve heard my women friends say that if they’re dancing with their girlfriends, then leave them alone.
Add the no-go situations listed in this article and, really, what’s left?
These days if people are in public they are generally on their phones, wearing earbuds/headphones or eating. And, what if you workout regularly and want a woman who works out regularly, also? You have an abundance of women right before you to choose from multiple times a week at your gym, but you shouldn’t approach (or do so at risk of great peril lol)?
It’s tight for the guys out here these days…lol
So in summary, basically don't approach women at all? Unless, like Uncle Hugh said, you are Tom Brady and then none of these rules apply…
Women put up so many rules about men approaching and pursing them…now i understand why the average man doesnt even bother in trying to pursue women. We make ti so difficult for a guy to try and court us, but yet are upset when we are perpetually single and unmarried.
Carry on….
Are you serious?! Then when is the guy supposed to approach you? [crickets]
Once you're exclusive, women would rather talk on the phone all night long than text but when they are first meeting there's rules on when you should approach her based on if she had headphones in????? There is a such thing as pause and repeat. No, you don't have to agree to go out on a date, but if you are out in public, why get so hot and bothered when someone speaks to you? smh!!!!
If a guy has approached you in a RESPECTFUL manner, it's rude to dismiss him with an attitude. Who I quickly dismiss are the ones that say "ey shawty/yellowbone" or who get touchy-feely.
I think I've said this before, but if a man is rudely dismissed by a woman despite him being a complete gentleman, then the problem is NOT him, it's the woman. But don't take it as if every woman is like that, only the ones you're not meant to be with.
Have to agree that these lists are getting out of hand. I know so many female friends who complain that men do not approach anymore to let them know they are interested. Ha…it’s because we are telling them not to! Personally, if I am out and about, I see a guy I’m interested in and he feels the same, start with a smile and go from there. Don’t be afraid. No wonder they think we’re all crazy.
So women have an extensive list of when/how a man can approach, they claim that they'll never approach a dude yet they wonder where all the great single guys are? The math isn't adding up
The other reasons I understand, but not holla'n at the gym just sounds stupid. I would think that's 1 of the easiest places to engage b/c a) we're both there for the same thing and b) we can see exactly what the other is working w/. My only thing w/ meeting a woman at the gym is if things don't work out, it might be a little awkward.
Hm, for me it's not what I'm doing in so much as who it is that's trying to catch my attention and how they're trying to to catch my attention. And context matters, too…how I'd respond to a stranger at 2 AM on a Bronx bound 3 train is different than how I'd respond to a stranger at a social.
A guy approached me in the library while i was reading…he sat down next to me and after about 15 minutes, he leaned over and asked: "you know where i can get a cup of coffee around here?"..that mofo knew where to get coffee lol…but i recognized given the setting, there wasn't an easy way to approach AND i thought he was pleasing on the eyes, so i gave way for small talk. Had he said: "well that book looks boring"..cute or not, i woulda been like Amina and given him the silent treatment..
PS: Smart women break away from her girls because we know that the likelihood a dude will approach a group, especially by himself, is slim to none.
There are only two constants- every girl who answered was under 30 and all said "UNLESS it looks like I'm interested". For every approach they said not to attempt I have a story for how it worked out for me because a guy did (well, except for work).
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Basically, we women are full of sh*t. I said it. The demographic we attract from 20's and beyond looks like a pyramid, so they concoct these random-a$$ rules to funnel the traffic when the pickings are overwhelming. Conversely, men's looks like a diamond, so that "picky" thing doesn't happen until their 30's when they need to funnel traffic. It is what it is, but please don't act like any of the above scenarios don't work. The key is to simply MOVE ON if she isn't interested. THAT'S where we cross over into harassment. Well, that and approaching me with overtly sexual, abrasive language or trying to touch me. But y'all don't do that, right?
My recent post StyleWatch; Evelyn Lozada Launches Vida Lux Cosmetics!
I feel like women just be talkin lol
If i came with a master plan to randomly stumble into interaction with a woman(and she is attracted to me i suppose), even if she was jogging down the alley with headphones in at 2am, she would catch interest, if i made seem like fate is at work lol
*when she's at church
*when she's out with another dude–even if it's just a friend of hers
*when she's out with her girls (especially if her girls aren't attractive they'll c*ck block for sure)
*when/if they're out with their children (unless you have yours and you can use the 'play date' angle)
just to name a few
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*rolls eyes*
The Supreme court decided growing and consuming your own product was interstate commerce. In other words, failure to engage in interstate commerce affects interstate commerce and so is part of interstate commerce.
Girl age 16: “You’re such a nice guy.”
Translation: ” I don’t want to hurt your feelings, or come off as a bitch to my friends, but I’m really much more attracted to Bad Boys – outlaw bikers, the football team’s quarterback, basically any guy who appears dangerous and exciting. You’re Nice, nice and mundane”
Girl age 22: “You’re such a nice guy.”
Translation: “Thanks for listening on the phone to me cry, fall into verbal hysterics and drone on for hours about my Jerk BF (oh, and my little dog too). You’re really sweet, and deserve a girl (which isn’t me) who can appreciate how nice (i.e. mundane) you are.”
Girl age 28: “You’re such a nice guy.”
Translation: “I know you’ve always been (an) my emotional tampon, and thanks for sticking with it – any sane guy would’ve found a far better prospect by now. And while I’m beginning to see that guys like you are stable, dependable and tend to make a lot more money than the Jerks I’ve dated, I think I’m gonna hold out for a hotter guy than you while my looks still hold up”
Woman age 32: “Why can’t I just find a nice guy?”
Woman age 35+: “You’re such a nice guy.”
Translation: “Oh, you’re a Nice Guy,..here, let me suck that for you. See? Being a Nice Guy does get you laid!,..thanks for being there for me when I needed you; my fatherless kids appreciate your generosity too. How chivalrous of you to forgive my past indiscretion and take us in, I wish there were more guys like you. I really pity the women who can’t appreciate your kind of dedication – you are so different from “other guys””.