It’s amazing how many layers to dating there are.

The more time flies by, the more different things begin to matter more to me. These things aren’t usually things that you can see. They’re really ideas, attitudes, and philosophies I look for a potential prospect to have. In conversing with different people, I try to read their disposition on certain subjects.

One subject that has begun to matter more to me as of late is finance.

At 26, finances matter. When you date someone you look to see how someone manages their funds. It says a lot about someone who can live within their means. What I’ve noticed with some (at my age) is that they don’t live within their means. Some of these young ladies have poor practices as it pertains to managing expenses and their fun money.

This experience has shown me loud and clear that credit is still for people with money. There are too many people who put the carriage before the horse as it pertains to managing money. How you manage your money is a huge indicator to how responsible a person is.

The perspective that I’m coming from is one of my experiences with women.

I’m well aware that many guys aren’t good with their money as well. I’ve heard more than enough date horror stories. I think a word we all need to take heed to in life is “no.” Say no sometimes. We don’t always have it. As a matter of fact if I say no to attend a mix of some sort, there’s an 80% chance that it’s because I’m budgeting.

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We live in this connected world where so many events are happening, and you’ve just got to be there!! Damn it, it’s going to be a MOVIE! Well that sure is something to consider isn’t it? But there’s always a bigger picture. Saying no sometimes in the name of saving some bread is okay. Saying no means saying yes to a little sacrifice.

Say no to that date fellas when you know you ain’t got it.

Don’t make an ass out of yourself. As a man you’re the symbol of security and stability. Being decent with your finances is a huge indicator of how secure and stable you can be. When that young lady is out with you, she’ll get that vibe. The broke n**** with the Gucci belt just won’t look the same as he used to. Nothing against the Gucci though, but make sure everything else is covered before you stunt.

Ladies, say no to that sale sometimes.

If something seems like it’s too much bread at a time then wait a while to save the bread needed to get it. Use credit for the real stuff. Try to do that at least. I know you all hate seeing men who can’t afford more than Netflix and bread bowl pasta from Domino’s on a first date. Well guys hate hearing stories of you all not being able to afford something that you never planned to buy in the first place. If you’re making a pretty expensive purchase, save accordingly. I know Dame Dash isn’t into saving, but it’s useful; I promise.

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Dating is sexy when it’s responsible.

How you manage money is very indicative of how responsible you are. When you have a little bit of money to fool with dating can be fun. You have some more options. You can be a bit more spontaneous with the activities. There’s no worry hanging over your heads as to if you all can do something. It’ll only be a question of when. Learn to say no sometimes. In the long run you’ll be happier. You’ll probably draw better prospects to you as well. You see when your shit is together, you truly won’t accept someone who still doesn’t have a clue. Being responsible is sexy!

These are my words and I make no apologies.

DamnPops is a writer and podcaster on the staff at SBM: “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS and @NegroPPodcast . Also, subscribe on iTunes to the Negro Please Podcast and visit our website here!