This post comes from a resident commenter and a close friend of mine who has been around for a very long time … The Antidater.  Anyone following the comments of me and him when this site open won’t be surprised by anything here.

I used to want me an “Alpha Female” … yeah … I really gave up on that sh*t.

Enjoy …


Alpha Women and Beta Men: We Can’t Rule the Jungle Together

In the jungle, male animals in the group would fight each other to be the leader.  The Alpha Male is the most aggressive and outgoing leader in the pack that managed to kick every other male’s ass.  The Alpha Male would meet his match – the Alpha Woman, the strongest, most outgoing female in the group – and then rule they would run the group together.

This process doesn’t work quite the same for humans – especially black folk.  Alpha men and Alpha women just don’t get along.  Almost every black woman is an alpha woman.  Alpha women want to find an Alpha male to settle down with … and then beat him into submission until he becomes a Beta male.

A Beta male is a passive, non assertive, individual who doesn’t fight with his “lady”.  Alpha women don’t respect Beta men…but it’s easier for them to be in a relationship with one.

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Black women have been leading the household for generations.  After women’s liberation, black mothers told their daughters to be independent and that n****s ain’t sh*t.  Some sistas came from healthy households … but a lot of them were fathered or raised by “no good” n****s or worst … their fellow sistas who had man-hated.  Thus, the black woman is raised to be an Alpha woman – independent, educated, successful.

She don’t need a man!

The Black Alpha woman’s want to conquer her man.  Women want chivalry, excitement…essentially they want EVERYTHING.  The world isn’t enough … they need the universe.  You can never prove your love.  An amazing demonstration of a man’s love for his woman merely raises the bar for next time.  I’d be the first to admit that women ran the household back in the day … even before women’s lib … they just allowed brothas to think they were running it.  So, if women secretly ran the house back then – what’s good now?

The key problem is that women of all types are trying hard to carve out new roles in Society.  They are taking on traditionally masculine traits.  This doesn’t mean that guys should have to change drastically to suit women.

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I remember a conversation with a friend who suggested that women have become hybrids and guys should do so, too.



I personally think that notion is bullsh*t … it’s a cope out.  Men and women should try to be partner level now.  We should be opening up doors for each other and paying each other’s way.  Unfortunately, Alpha women don’t want a partnership…they just wanna be CEO.  Ladies, we can’t rule the jungle together if you wanna be the boss.

~The Antidater