From our good friend Eathan at IDateWhite.com. I have met a few black women who do frequent and enjoy sport bars (and not just to meet guys) … but I definitely feel him on this one.
On a side note … the Thursday Feature Suggestion Box is drying up. I know there are plenty of bloggers out there with good stuff the already wrote. Why not let your old thoughts be reborne … email me at sbm@singleblackmale.net with links to your old posts. And don’t just tell me your site … specific stuff that you liked!
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Black Women & Sports Bars
Since I met ZC22 two weeks ago, I’ve noticed some major social differences between black women and white women. ZC22 held a lot of promise when I originally met her. Besides the normal things that I look for in a woman, she just seemed really cool. We’ve been texting back and forth several times. We can’t seem to find enough common ground for a date. It seems that we are on the opposite side of the social world. She wants to do 1 of 2 things. Go dancing or go to dinner. I don’t mind doing either one of those things, but not immediately. Not on the 1st date. I want to do something totally different. I want to go out for drinks (happy hour), or possibly go out to watch the game.
This started a conversation among a group of my friends ( men and women). I’ve come to realize something that I’ve never paid any attention to before. Black women don’t go out to the sports bar to watch football. I’ve asked several people from different parts of the country and they all agree. It’s not a regular practice among black women. Most of them will watch the game at home or at some one’s house. I can’t believe I never noticed it.
Over the years, I regularly watch sports at a sports bar/restaurant. I watch football, basketball, hockey and UFC. I’ve noticed there are plenty of black men there. I’ve always noticed the white women there, but I didn’t realize there are very few black women. One of my good friends mentioned, they would rather go shopping. I’m not sure if he’s right. I know they’re not cheering where I watch the game.
The one thing I’m starting to realize is this is one of the reasons I began to date white women. I’m a pub type of guy. I enjoy going out to watch the game. I enjoy eating wings, burgers, french fries and having a cold beer. I have fun screaming at the TV with 200 other strangers. I enjoy running around the room giving hi-five to anyone around when the Cowboys score a touch down. That’s what I enjoy during football season and the NBA playoffs. Of course, the women that I see when I’m out watching sports are white women.
I’ve always heard women wonder why black men date interracial, this is a good place to look. It starts with something as simple as your social scene. The black women aren’t doing some of the things their white counterparts are doing.
Why do you think there is such a big difference? Is it because they are cheap and don’t want to spend the money? Am I the only one that has noticed this in the past?
Eathan makes a good point. I went out with a bunch of friends to sports bars to watch the Super bowl and there weren't many black women in the bars… wait I was definitely the only black woman at one establishment, dam and the only black women in this particular crew of friends.
I like to go to sports bars for major sporting events: the superbowl and NBA playoffs a major boxing match etc.. I like to be in the company of other fans and the excitement but it's not my thing on a regular basis. I can tolerate sports and watch the game with a guy without being a pain in the ass but I can't see myself going to sports bars on the regular. It may sound crazy but I feel like sports bars are a place for guys to go to and get away.
Sports bars aren't the only reason brothas are going interracial
I noticed the same thing…. I go out with my girls to watch football (cause I love it for all the wrong reasons), we're a mixed bunch, and they're aren't a lot of black women there.
I also noticed there weren't a lot of black men. LOL 😉
I personally feel like there are just women period WHITE and BLACK faking the funk to try and be down. I come from a sports nutty @zz family. My mother's cousin played for the 49'ers back in the day and they just a bunch of dam3n fools about sports.
Of course I'm the odd woman out all the time. I don't care. Everybody got a story about Bill. "When Bill used to play". The only thing I find fascinating about the "memory lane football" shyt is how the white women would BE stalking the players. And there were NEVER any black women. (This comes from my mother who went to all of his DC games and many of the SF games).
My theory is that MOST women not all. Don't have a true love for the game. Its about catchin penis' in action. be it at the bar or on the court/field/ice hockey thingy mac doodle. But newsflash..dudes are not checking for you there dear. They are not.
Me, I'm not gonna fake for what I generally don't feel passionate about.
Big games are a time to yes go shopping and get the best parking spaces, becacause there is less traffic. Due to women wanting to be all up under their man. I've have tried and tried to understand the game. But it is stupid to me. To mnay stops and starts. Just run the little ball down the field and lets go home. the end.
I love football, but again, I don't want to make it seem like I'm a FANatic… Hells no. I can name about 7 teams. LOL.
I watch the men. I love the way they play, their strength, their butts in those pants???? fahgetaboutit.
LOL. I've tried to teach myself football by reading this book… Yah, didn't work out very well.
"LOL. I’ve tried to teach myself football by reading this book… Yah, didn’t work out very well."
There were some team player wives in DC who had this sports clinic for women. I thought about going…they aired some of it on tv..all the x's and o's had me thinking about tick tac toe..im sorry i just don't wanna learn. And I can't pretend.
which is why i am banned from most of my families homes when the games are on (this is a lonely time of year for me) because i talk to much or ask too many questions. Whatever haters. My own mother rushes me off the phone when the games are on.
THE WORST is because my church is by FEDEX field..is that it takes me twice as long (15 minutes) to get to church. It seems like the fools are playing EVERY UPON EVERY SUNDAY. i will say they are polite drivers. though they have been known to try and steal God's parking spaces. Shame on you.
"though they have been known to try and steal God’s parking spaces. Shame on you."
Girl, you have me cracking up!
My ex tried to teach me but I didn't want to get on his nerves by asking the same question over and over so I acted like I knew what he was talking about….
I would agree that most black women are not going to sit up at a rowdy bar to watch the game. They will however chill on the couch and watch the game. This still doesn't mean you have to holler at the white chick just cause she is there. Now I'm open to people dating whomever they want but this isn't a good reason, you date white cause you like white women. But white do tend to be more outgoing and adventurous anyway.
I would say white girls are more adventurous but not necessarily outgoing. I go out and can enjoy myself in almost ny social setting bars, lounges, restaurants, bugging out a friend houses etc… it depends on the girl's personality. I like to try new things but I know my limits. One of my home girls i go out (yea she's white) with she's a lil too "adventurous" for me but hey she's following her bliss lol
"One of my home girls i go out (yea she’s white) with she’s a lil too “adventurous” for me but hey she’s following her bliss lol"
ME TOO. One of my girls is white and she def does the most… I have to pull away from her sometimes. LOL
ooooh so this is where I gotta go to find my "Something New"?!? lol. Nah, I don't watch sports on tv but I would go to a game if asked. I wouldn't mind hanging out in a sports bar at all; I just hope the "no-smoking" applies to those bars here in DC. Come to think of it, I never even dated a guy who was a total sports fanatic either. So a new world to explore I suppose. Hmmmmmm.
@Commenters: Has anyone noticed any significant difference between men who are not into sports and those who are? I think we had a similar post with frat guys.
Happy Thursday everyone!!!
"@Commenters: Has anyone noticed any significant difference between men who are not into sports and those who are? I think we had a similar post with frat guys."
oh yeah..umm i don't know shyt about sports. BUT it is a requirement for my man. It gets the testosterone up. You know what I mean. I like being the girl. and a man not liking sports is just too much for me. And I question how much testosterone you got flowing through your body. And I need my alone time too. And I find Sundays are PERFECT for that little escape.
I disagree. Visiting sports bars/pubs is not limited to white folks.
I used to live in Dallas and me and my friends (who are mostly professional Black women) would frequent sports bars and pubs. Dallas is one of those places where happy hour and sports bars is the norm for professionals. If you want to mingle with professional Blacks definitely do First Fridays or happy hour at some club on a Friday after work. On Sunday evenings when the Cowboys play if you’re looking for other people to watch the game with, you’re either at someone’s house hanging out (which I like to do now more) or you’re at the sports bar. (and try being the only Saints fan in a room full of Cowboys fans.)
@westindian: I'm with you. I cannot tolerate the cigs.
"@Commenters: Has anyone noticed any significant difference between men who are not into sports and those who are? I think we had a similar post with frat guys"
He has to be into sports… it's just weird to not be…. my history teacher admitted he was not into sports… someone joked, "B/c you are a dork." It's just unheard of.
At least I'm not the only one that notices this. I agree with Shelia that Dallas has a busy happy hour and 1st Friday. I'm just wondering is there a place that I'm not going to that has a higher ratio of black women? I've been told several places to check out.. but the results have been the same.
@ Comeback Girl stealing God's parking space.. hahah that's got me rolling right now.
yet another reason why i'm called "white girl"
I LOVE sports bars
Champps, Sideline, Pasttime..I LOVE THEM
I used to go up to Stonefish and watch the games faithfully EVERY SUNDAY
and there were PLENTY OF BLACK WOMEN THERE
there are plenty of black women who go to bars to watch sports on tv…they just go to
DUH
BLACK BARS (or bars more frequented by the african american community such as Sideline, Stonefish or any other place thats by capital centre blvd)
I see them all the time, hollering, talkin spit, wearing the hell out of their jersey's AND DRINKING
Just cause we dont go to "pubs" don't mean we don't go to bars to watch sports
PUH….LEAAASEEEE
You will find plenty of black women at bars watchin the game…you just gotta know what bars to find the BLACK WOMEN
*I want to say a$$hole..this dude is lookin for a way to justify his GUILT of dating white…if he was so confident in it..he wouldn't need to "dis" another culture of women just to justify his own wants*
SBM…..Im just shaking my head on this one
eathan
see my post 15
Try spots where umm..there is a higher ratio of black peole
Thanks
Good Morning Folks 🙂
@Comeback
I cosign your points on post #3 "personally feel like there are just women period WHITE and BLACK faking the funk to try and be down." and "Due to women wanting to be all up under their man."
I do not like sports…don't get em'…don't wanna learn. But, if that's what someone I am dating is into, then I will tag along and fake the funk every now and again if he wants my company. Just like I'd like him to come shopping with me (even though most if not all men hate going shopping with a woman) just because it's what I like and would like his company. We all gotta fake the funk from time to time.
…and then you get married and all the faking ceases…*dun dun dun* lol
@"Eathan"
"Is it because they are cheap and don’t want to spend the money? "
uh, No. I can't speak for the ones that sit at home and watch and actually like sports. But, people that like to dance and drink socially would spend X amount of dollars at a club or lounge. People that like music spend their money going to concerts, etc etc. So, I do not think it's about being cheap – antisocial maybe. 🙂
"antisocial maybe."
That's really what it comes down to.
Most black women I know like sports just slightly. Sure, there are a few that really get passionate about their team (I've seen it once with a bartender at a pub in College Park; homegirl knew her stuff) but again I say FEW.
Now as far as the reason to date IR, to each his own. I do like the fact that when you are at some of those establishments, white women are a little more open to talk and have fun. When I've gone to venues where there are black women, they do the usual "formation" where they coral themselves in a booth or a table, talk amongst themselves in their own little social group. I very seldom see them engage most of the other people there. Sort of like the club thing where they dance around in a circle amongst themselves. Or maybe I'm not going to the right places.
@CPT
"When I’ve gone to venues where there are black women, they do the usual “formation” where they coral themselves in a booth or a table, talk amongst themselves in their own little social group."
It may have to do with the need to protect one another – no matter what the setting. It's also a personality trait. Some women/people can shy away from the group and spark up a convo with a total stranger – or even invite them into the group setting. As a man, sometimes you just have to know how to break down the barrier and give it a shot.
Eathan, I don't wanna call you an idiot, because I am hoping that your sentiments are from real experiences, thus making it some sort of reality for you. However, I am a black woman who is SUPER into football! If I don't have other obligations, my saturdays and sundays are spent watching football, of and let's not forget MNF and the college games on thursday. I go to sports bars, friends' houses, pubs, etc to watch the games. Last season when I lived in miami, I was religiously at the quarterdeck on SoBe with my laptop, some wings, and a copule of libations to get my day going after the 10 am sermon. If that's not enough, I also play fantasy, watch espn, and the nfl network to stay on top of it. The funny thing is that I have A LOT of female friends who are the exact same way!! I don't know what kinda whack jobs you run into, but your blanket statement doesn't apply to a lot of black women. Perhaps I'm an anamoly, or maybe it's because I am from TEXAS, where football is KING, or maybe you just don't hang out at places where black women who like sports like to frequent. Who knows. Regardless, I just want to let you know that there are plenty of women who are into football like yourself.
P.S. I hate when men wanna talk to me about football, then wanna argue me down about somthing, and think they're right just because I am a woman and can't possibly know more about football than them. Idiots!!
"It may have to do with the need to protect one another – no matter what the setting. It’s also a personality trait. Some women/people can shy away from the group and spark up a convo with a total stranger – or even invite them into the group setting. As a man, sometimes you just have to know how to break down the barrier and give it a shot."
Understood, however how much protection would you really need in a bar? I mean okay…the occasional drunk jerk might step to you and say something off key, but if there are other people in there cheering on the game or what have you…what's to be afraid of? I would think it would be an opportune time for those ladies, specifically the ones who "want to know where the men are" to meet someone in a lively and social setting. Then again, I'm no woman so I can't even begin to understand you all's thoughts.
I never thought about it like that and I must agree!
Dang I know where I will be socializing this football season! ;o)
"Dang I know where I will be socializing this football season!"
Good…get out there and have fun. Just relax. Even if you aren't into the game, I'm sure there are plenty of folks who just wanted to get out and be in a different setting.
@therenegade:
Texas is a football state. You all stay interested from the High school level up and have a great competitive spirit. Same with Cali. I guess it has to do with culture. I like women who can analyze the game as well as the guys do. At least I know they won't just hang around under the guise of "it makes my man happy if I sit here and act interested." Football is probably the only sports season I get excited about.
@CPT
"Understood, however how much protection would you really need in a bar?"
I think it's just an underlying feeling – not really that we consciously think that something is going to pop off in the bar – but it's what we're used to.
"I think it’s just an underlying feeling"
Ya'll so scary…LOL
I seldom see anything really go down at the daytime venues. Now there is the occasional belligerent drunk fan that gets overzealous, but I usually watch the bouncers do their magic levitation act with him and then the party continues. The guys that are passionate and talking loud don't bother me either…it's just friendly competition and some of the shyt talking is actually hilarious.
i dunno i really feel like sports is sacred man time. Where they need to be alone.
its like me going into a spa and seeing a man getting his feet and nails done…GET OUT OF HERE..RIGHT NOW. YOU ARE VIOLATING.
its people treading on territory where they honestly shouldn't be. And i don't care what anybody says. If there were women playing football…other straight women would not be DYING to be there.
reason why female basketball suffers poorly…the same women that profess their love of sports are NOT filling the seats rooting other YAYA's on…SO STOP LYING and STOP PLAYIN, and have a nice day.
the level of interest in said game increases when penis appears.
"the level of interest in said game increases when penis appears."
ROFL! LOL. You are right.. I'm on the shallow end and will not watch women playing football.. I dont' want to look at woman's Donks. LOL.
College sports are big around here (no NFL team) and we used to get free tickets at my old job to see the women's basketball… I found that more interesting than the males for some reason… maybe b/c the people that were there, were actually there to watch and cheer, vs. plotting to get a player.
Nick i already 3rd eye'deded (yes eye'ded) I NKOW you would be there. And prolly Shelia too. To root on other yaya's. And prolly Cuzzo as well. I honestly feel that.
but every professed sports nut who is a woman…DOES NOT GET DOWN WITH EVERY SINGLE sport that a woman plays. Otherwise those women would not be just toppin out at 150k OVERSEAS…they would be right here commanding near the same money as the men.
@Comeback: Well Amen to that! Plus, I think us ya-yas are a rare breed anyway… for every 1 of us there are THOUSANDS, hating a woman.
A lot of women want to be "saved" and are going those games for all the wrong reasons. All dressed up, high heels… yep, I watched the Gold Digger special.
Sure my fantasy is to have a NFL-er/Ex NFL-er/ or one with a body like one… but that's cause they look so good.
"dunno i really feel like sports is sacred man time. Where they need to be alone."
We can easily turn it into that time if you annoy us during the game. Now if you're cool and can root on the team and be content with the action…okay. Now if you turn to your man during 3 and Long and decide to discuss where the relationship is going or ask "what are you thinking" then we will banish you to somewhere else so that we can watch the turnover on downs.
"A lot of women want to be “saved” and are going those games for all the wrong reasons. All dressed up, high heels… yep, I watched the Gold Digger special."
We spot them and we see them. WE know what their game is…however…the ones we would rather talk to are those that are really into the game. At least we know we have something in common off the bat and it can be a good lead-in to a conversation.
"We spot them and we see them. WE know what their game is…however…the ones we would rather talk to are those that are really into the game. At least we know we have something in common off the bat and it can be a good lead-in to a conversation"
Note to me: Wear jeans and flats (I don't do tennis shoes.) LOL.
@Comeback
"other straight women would not be DYING to be there."
lol…hells naw.
"the level of interest in said game increases when penis appears.”
and yaymen to that.
your 3rd eye is on point today ma'am. I'm suspecting that die-hard bball fans aren't as into the female bball teams.
I must say there is a little truth in all of the comments. True said it best when saying, : "there are plenty of black women who go to bars to watch sports on tv…they just go to DUH BLACK BARS (or bars more frequented by the african american community such as Sideline, Stonefish or any other place thats by capital centre blvd)"
I've lived int he DMV for 3 years and have a spot on Sunday's at my favorite sports bar to watch my Giants. There are plenty of other sistahs there, some to watch the game like me and others to hook a man. True white girls may be adventurous but I doubt you'll find them chomping at the bit to be the the ONLY white girl/person in the bar so why would you expect a black woman to frequent lily white bars/pubs? Black women are more down to earth than the writer gives us credit for. If you frequent white spots you are going to find white women. If you frequent black spots you'll find black women. That's just common sense playa!
socialism based on racism…????
Black people had to act more reserved during segregation and slavery and what not especially around white people. We have to prove we weren't monkey's and animals and thus had to go the extra mile to be reserved
just like yesterday…some people dont want to be associated with music that stereotypes because well…they dont want to be seen as "dumb", "ignorant" undeducated, and what not…
same thing with not being all "wild" in public *yet another reason they call me white girl, i was always ALWAYS outgoing, social, not afraid to be me, life of the party…black girls be lookin at me sideways tellin me to take a chill pill..but deep down I think they envy me somewhat..*
I have to piggyback the Renegade, as we are both Texans who went to undergrad and live in a state where football is HUGE. I can take or leave basketball, but I love watching football games, particularly NCAA.
You date white girls because you want to. Good for you.
While I know this will knock a couple points off of my attractiveness factor (like a lot of things I say don't already do that) … but I am not a big sports fan … so I'm rarely at the sports bar. Used to be a huge basketball & football fan … then just football … then the Redskins started to slum so I gave up the whole NFL rather than change teams.
But I know I have come across a couple of black females here that are quick to hop into a black sports bar. I also bump into a lot of female sports fans to be honest.
I sense HATE from the mention of white women…. gee thats an unusual reaction…. LOL
if there are 50 states with black women in them… and ONE state whose culture is born and bred football has a higher rate of black women who watch football…. I think its still OK to make a generalization that black women dont go out to watch the game.
Texas is not the whole US.
It's not the mention of white women drawing the reaction. Women go where the men go. Black women go where the men go. If the men go out to watch the game who do you think is also going to show up for the game. Not to say that all of the sistahs are going to be watching the game but they are going to make an effort and put on their cutest outfit to go looking at the men. It's one thing to say that you don't date black women because they don't hang out specifically where you do but to say that we as a group don't go out to watch the game is ridiculous. Just be real with yourselves and us, you aren't checkin for us so you aren't at the same places we are. You are checkin for the other and they are in abundance where you choose to hang out.
As for the topic….
gotta agree with comeback. Many women fake the funk. Monday night football at the champs by me, usually will have a nice amount of women.
My master agrees with me that they come to pick up the men and the men go to watch the game,
speaking of my master http://joao-pierre.blogspot.com/
but anyways. Women are more aggressive at MNF, but then again the average age is usually older. Its usually cougars and 30somethings at MNF.
I have no problem with a black woman NOT comming out to a sports bar….. LOL. I have many more issues with my women to think about stuff like this. its quite ok, I like my sistas home getting ready for work on monday night and sunday night.
now granted… I dont wanna hear the cries of "omg there are no single black men" comming from their mouth when most of us are sitting watching the game on sunday and they are home on the internet typing about how we dont exist.
I must say, I went out lastnight. 2 older sistas, spoke to me but didnt flirt (both single) and didnt have real conversation. The 21 year old sista… thin, braces and long hair and did I mention THIN.. ya she spent her time talkin to an asian dude and never came over to speak to me. and the other sista just sat in the corner lookin mad. ya'll gotta get more aggressive, we had 2 white women tell us that they "love to cook" and would cook for us… all we have to do is bring the red wine.
see why cant my sistas say stuff like that to me?
black women go where the men go?
what state is this?
dispite there being more black men than women at the 30 something bracket…. I see about the same number of black men as black women when I go out. my sister dosent go out… she stays home and every once and a while gets together with her 2 other fine as hell single black female friends and they go to the movies…..
but never do the go "out on the prowl"
i'm dropping by to say hi…i'll be back for more later
@HNIC–I don't see your point because you've covered the issue. "dispite there being more black men than women at the 30 something bracket…. I see about the same number of black men as black women when I go out." If there are more of you than us and you see both groups out in equal number then if brotha's aren't getting any play its cause they are playing in a different field.
I I have heard this before, and I do see that out here in Chicago. I not a sports fan really anymore. But there are 2 sports bars across the street from my building. Usually when I eat there or whenever there is a game and the crowd is leaving I don't see any black womens faces.
In Eathan's defense … there are plenty of more reasons he date's white women besides just the fact that they run the sports bar.
Funny that every Texas woman says this aint true … but Eathan is from Texas …
I have plenty of reasons why I date outside my race. I have no guilt about my choices in life. My experiences are common to what I see in the areas I travel and where I live.
Before I wrote this, I verified with others if they noticed the same thing in other cities. Some of the black women read this site.. and many of them don't, but they said they don't make it a habit of going to the sports bars to watch the game. I'll be in Houston in a few weeks and I'm going to see if it's different there. And I will be on the predominately black area so I can defend everyone who says I'm wrong.
Well I dont like sports, dont follow thats just not my thing, but I do know of many black women who go to sports bars and actually like and are well informed about the game, I agree with those who said if Eathan dates white than thats because thats what he likes, not because black women arent where he goes, he is obviously not checking for sistas, which is why he doesnt see them where he goes, I also agree with Comeback that alot of these women are faking the funk, if you see golddiggers at games, why wouldnt they be at the sports bars? I doubt all these white chicks he encounters are all that enthused with the game, they tryna catch them a man
First, let me say this is my first time posting, but I read the blog everyday. So….
I was just talking about this to one of my male friends. I am a big sports fan, and go to sports bars often to watch the game. Here in Raleigh, the Ohio State alums meet at a bar/restaurant to watch our big games. And the last time I was there, I counted 3 black women; me, my friend, and one other young woman. However, there weren't many black men either, maybe about 6 or 7. I think this cuts both ways. I love going out to bars and pubs, and when I see a black man in one of these establishments, he is usually with a gang of white people, or he is with other black men only paying attention to white women. On the other hand, the white men in the bar are very attentive to me. I think single black people need to think outside of the box and learn to at least try different things if we want to meet different types of people.
I can't speak for all Black women, nor would I want to.
All I know is that I was out at a sports bar last week watching the World Series Game 2 with a beer and some cheese fries.
When bball season comes around and my team is playing, my fave thing is to be around fellow fans so we can cheer together or comfort each other in the terrible event of a loss.
I like beer too. Sports bars are no problem for me.
Maybe some women don't feel like they'd be welcomed there. Maybe if more men invited their female friends out to the bar to catch a game or if you invited them out for dates, they might get the idea that a sports bar is a place for them as well.
But like i said, I can't speak for what they're thinking. I'm cool with catching a game out.