By now, anyone who wanted to see it, has seen it.  Kobe and Vanessa Bryant were spotted kissing after the Lakers defeated the Toronto Raptors on Valentine’s Day.  Vanessa was looking beautiful as usual, and Kobe seemed to be back to his traditional game-ending kiss with his wife.

Wait a minute, what?  Yes, that’s right, it appears that Kobe and Vanessa are working it out and trying to save their marriage.  If you’ve been living under a rock and the last you heard they were getting divorced and Vanessa got $150Ms out of him, check out the story here.  I even heard a rumor that she hasn’t even signed the paperwork to finalize the settlement.

Insert  hate.

Let’s be honest 90% of the Free World hates Kobe Bean Bryant.  They don’t want him to get anything in life.  They hate Jordan comparisons, they hate his championships, he’s a snitch, he’s a rapist, he’s an adulterer, he’s a jerk, he’s just about anything you can find wrong about a man, people will attribute that to Kobe.  Excuse me, I forgot, he also can’t fight.

However, in the midst of all the words of encouragement for Vanessa that were poured out and all the hatred and disgust that was poured out on Kobe, likely to comfort Vanessa, we never factored in that she might be able to still save her marriage with Kobe, who is also the father of her two small children.  You see society has this way about themselves that they actually love to put their foot in their mouth.  I’ve seen this happen so many times that I tell people they should watch what they say because you never know how the situation is going to pan out.  Because you might tell your homegirl that her child’s father was a no good sucker who wasn’t about sh*t, but then she decides to work it out and now her self-esteem is on zilch because you basically had the Passion of Her Baby Daddy in your last phone call.

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I would point to two things that are the reason why this always happens; first, because society insists on cheering against happiness and second, because most of us just don’t know how to be happy.  People are always fascinated with scandal.  We watch a divorce settlement everyday on our TMZ reader, but when someone gets married we probably won’t even look at the pictures.  You know everything there is to know about Kobe’s divorce from Vanessa, let me ask you this, what were the colors in Lamar and Khloe’s wedding?  They say misery loves company and that’s what we cheer for, another person on the team.  Much respect to that woman who when she gets the call tells her homegirl, “Girl, I hope you haven’t told everybody, but let me share with you my story and how I wish I had blabbered my mouth to you guys and tried to work it out with Tyrone.”

The other thing is people don’t know how to be happy.  I’m sure we’ve all dated someone who it seemed like what was going on in their life was a first.  It’s that girl who has a good man but she ruins it by thinking things like, “No man wants a girl who isn’t a little crazy.”  It’s that girl who no matter the fact that she lives with her boyfriend, sleeps with him every night and he tells her four or five times a day that he loves, despite all of that, she still snoops through his phone and wants to know his whereabouts at all times.  They just don’t know how to be happy.

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What we’ve got to think about here today is our reaction to when couples decide to reconcile.  More than that, maybe you’ve gotten to the point in life that you conclude that you have lost all faith in the world being a “nice” place.  So he cheated, you know what we all know, that he did it before and they made it through it.  Fact of the matter is, only Vanessa and Kobe know what Vanessa and Kobe … Gianna … and Natalia can make it through.  Truth be told, Kobe always knew, his first comments about the divorce was that he was determined to work to save his marriage.  In fact, Kobe’s always had a way about going out and achieving his goals in a way that’s out of this world, makes you wonder about that sixth chip, he’s done everything else  he’s set his mind to.

And then you have those other people, who no matter how great of a guy Kobe could be, or great of a father he could be, they just want him dead.  Smh… nothing we can do about that.  Thank God It’s Friday!

What are you thoughts on Vanessa and Kobe getting back together?  Do you think this means they are back together, or just trying to work it out?  Also, do you think society gives love a chance?  Do you think we’re pessimistic to the point of not being able to be a cheerleader for love?  I’m interested to hear your thoughts.

– Dr. J