This is a two-way interview.

In DC, we currently have an epidemic where men are able to NOT talk to women just because there are so many here. If you walk with your hands out of your pocket, chances are you will pick up a woman at the club. Keep in mind, I haven’t said anything about if you want to take her home. DC is full of hoodrats and scuddlebuckets. It wasn’t until recently that I started to notice that men do not know how to talk to women, because they are never required to. They simply post up, exchange a smile and offer a drink. This can actually get you very far with women. You would think that in 2010, women weren’t still falling for the #ionlytextswindle, but it is alive and well.

So the message here today will be simple, here’s Part I of How to Talk to Women and Get Anywhere.

Greetings – Saying hello to a woman is probably the easiest part, but it’s the part that most men mess up the most. Here’s how you say hello to a woman; smile and say, “Hello.” You may say, “Hey” if you would like. I don’t know where men got the idea that the first thing has to be some rank pick up line or a shock marketing tactic. Don’t get crazy.

See Also:  Men Are Not Perfect Vol 3: The One that Got Away

Conversation pieces – Try and not talk about politics, race, relationships, or anything of serious significance upon first meeting a woman. Try this one, “So what brought you out tonight/today?” This will give you everything you need to know about everything that is about to happen after. If she says, “It’s my birthday” GO IINNN. If she says, “I’m here with my stank sister who is over there flirting with every negro in the club! And she know she married” offer a drink and then tell her to have a nice night.

Getting a phone number – Do not give a woman your business card, she’s not going to call you. Here’s the best way to get someone’s phone number; have something to talk about or do. My swindle is that I always make plans upon meeting the person. My line is, “To be honest, with you, I’m about to get at this bar, but what are you doing tomorrow? I probably will hit this brunch on U Street, come with?” (The other swindle here is food.)

First dates – Most men have no clue what a date is. They just can’t figure it out to save their lives. When I just invited shorty to brunch, that is not our first date. A date does not occur until you, speak on the phone and say, “Hey, would you like to…” Simply put, if you’re wondering if it was a date, the key is you have to ask someone on a date. Also, some more advice is to set up a date where you can actually talk. Movies and dinner are not the best date ideas. Dave & Buster’s is the move, or ESPN Zone.

See Also:  The Not So Tall Man’s Guide to Gaining Friends, Influencing People and … Winning

After a date, and if you plan on having sex with her – Talk to her regularly and take her on another date. I swear a Black man will do something once and think he deserves all the credit. It’s a reason why there’s only half a negro playing golf in the PGA. Black men would only work on getting a hole in one of the first hole and think they won the Masters. Once you get the number, talk to her, and then take her on a date do not think that this is an excuse to just text and gchat from now on.  (Minor caveat: Some people are just not phone people, if that’s you, then you must do more to have more in-person communication.  Suggest drinks or lunch or coffee, as a means to have a quick conversation without being on the phone.)

I do not want to fluster you weak guys out there who have been taking down copious notes. Feel free to email me on the side or tweet me your questions if I’m being unclear or I didn’t mention something you wanted to know. I’ll be back soon with follow up posts to finish out how to talk to women. But I wanted to get this out to you before the summer came and people started having conversations at barbecues. Ciao.